The lonesome gifts that fate and nature lend us,
Most often are the very ones that end us.
-Chaucer.
Oh My God! I think I am gonna shit myself.
-Delux at The Annandale on Saturday night.
You are all perfect.
I am metal and dirty…..
-Me to ya’ll right now.
So…Did ya’ll tell ya parole officers where you were at on Saturday night?You Motherfuckers are AMAZING!!!!
Great pit,Great time and Delux managed to get through the show with out crapping himself on stage.[ I was a bit disapointed there but all in all….] Sorry for breaking the mike stand [Again] I have been too into this whole destructo thing…Dont fear….I broke myself as well…Anthony pulling down the mad sound, B* looking illeagally hot and being the merch queen, Dan pulling my fat barefoot ass up on the bar, Gotta love the Annandale man, its the fuckin’ CBGBS of Sydney. [ Dan you are the man, Thanx Brent ] Fingers x’ed for that Easter show….with a line up like that Jesus would be rolling his own rock out of the way…..
So to all the great staff and the three great bands that we got to rock with?….Well alright!
You sikfuks make it sooooo good. I feel like some of you guys have been to as many of our gigs as I fucking have and I love it.
Miss Nick from the trailerpark? So glad that ya got to see what became of me….
Think I could play forever when I get up there. You have no idea how bad I needed that show. Enough with the comments about the new hair already! Cept’ the sikfuk That said that it made me look like the monster out of “The Preditor”.I dont mind that a bit!. I heard after the fact that One of you SF’s got nailed pretty hard in the pit…I dont know who it was…but if you are reading this I hope that you are alright. Take care of each other down there. Shit can get weird when its all going off but if you see some one go down go after them. You may be the one who is down one day…
Nice one Beau…And tell The Glamours to kiss my ass for not comming down to the show.
The B* Is watching “Heathers” and catching up on the soccer scores.
Gold star if you can tell me who and where the term “Mosh” was coined by and what it stands for.
[ I keep all the letters that I never send you and I hate myself for every word that I let escape Me. If I had the energy, If I had it in me at all, I would sit filthy in the middle of a room someplace that has no name, more often than not internal,And I would make mush-note-confettii for the cherubs with their perfect curls to rain down on us as we kill each other blind fucking in my big ugly imagination…..]
Digress Much do we Madden?!!??
Sooo… With Ross back it looks like we are gonna leave ya’ll with another ep before we fuck off midyear. I dont know WHAT you guys are gonna make of this shit.
So! The irony factor of the picture in Rolling Stone Huh? The one non drinker there!!! I hadta do it! Funny as all shit! Me looking tanked in a bar…belive me! I was having flashbacks!!!Look…the whole “Straight edge” thing shits me to tears to tell you the truth and the reason that I dont attatch myself to it is for all the same reasons that I tend not to attatch myself to fucking anything. Just another excuse/religion/lable…. You do what you do untill it gets done. I have said it before. I dont care what you do just dont get in my way and all is well. I am not some kind of abstinence poster child. I just have to much to do to be ruled by social interaction dick shaking chemical hooha……
I just watch everyone else do it instead. At the Townie…usually with ‘Duster…..
And write it down.
And turn it into songs……..
I will tell you the whole fable one day….maybe.
Three things that I am sure of this crapola morning.
I need more ink.
A new knife
And that you can never go back.
Now on a major Hendrix bender. Always had a real thing about him. He brought the farm on my birthday many moons before I made it here so that could be it…. Anyway, His shit is giving me a real girl boner at the moment.You know that line in “Red House” ? When he is lamenting about his “….woman over yonder in said red blah blah…” and just before He kicks into the solo he mutters “Dont matter I still got my Guitar….”?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…….. ..
Perfect.
I am so impressed with all the profiles and art work that is going up on the SF site. Miss S is the tech-goddess behind it all and for that I say thank you. Inlist as may people as you can cause come July we are going into battle.Keep it comming…..
Oh yeah! How fucking cool! Play a great gig and then come home and veg out to Guns and Roses all nite on rage!!!!!. Am proud to say that the B* and Myself [ Much to Mikes smirking amusement ] lustlily bellowed along with ever golden moment.Natch.
I am totally tapped out so by your leave.
SF4L.
Michele.
Sat March 6th 04′-Nothing interesting ever happens to me….
John Paul Jones at the height of Led Zepplins total world domination.-Love you so much it makes me sick……..
Kurt Cobain.
I see you when I shut down. When I go inside the carnage that I carry round ,The autopsy that is still moving, that answers to my name. You are the only clean thing I know.You make me wanna say a lust filled novena for 9 fuckin’ days and light candles to your graven image. I have got nothing to give you and even if I did it would be nothing that someone good like you would want. I wish that I could stop thinking about you cause it is not doing me any favours. The more I think of you the more I realise how broken I really am and some days I just dont need it. If you said my name I would turn to dust.
I could never do me to you. It just wouldnt be polite. I was raised better than that.
Rain,
I dont do laundry for fucking months see, All part of my domestic retardation. Cardonal rule. If you cant see it and you can live with the smell, it does not exist. This is how I end up sleeping on a mattress precariously balanced on a festering Everest of shit that I have not washed since the last tour. Then, for no fucking reason that I can lay a didget on, I get all sanctimonious at 6 am after watching “Waynes World” again and decide to do the whole lot. Poilsh MY fucking halo.
Well I am gonna be running round in my bathrobe for the next few days and I am sure that it will look most fetching while I build my ark. Fucking Rain. I am in a genitically desiginated bad mood as it and then this weather. Rain makes my scars itch. Rain is not good for shit unless you have someone to fuck and heaps of drugs and rich parents to turn a blind eye and pay for the lot. As it stands I have less money than that dude who talks to the bus stop on George street [ “Dad! I told you to go home!!!”] and dont do drugs anymore…I am not gonna go to far into the sex thing as I am the only member of my band who gets none.
My imagination could get me arrested in at least 43 states though.
This is gonna be one rant that I go back to all nite. My sister is out of town and I have the house to myself.Always nice though when you dont hafta bother with pants and volume control on the stereo… so you guys hafta suffer through my musings. Blackie was round last nite and he told me that he had just finished the last song on the new Nunchuckka Superfly album.” It goes for 20 minutes!” he beamed at me. See what too many YES albums can do to a man?. My Brother the prog head…I cant wait to hear it. If you missed The Hard Ons at the Excelisor…oh man…What they did to “Suck and swallow”! fuck! Now That was a 20 min sonic cluster fuck.Fuckin’ trippin’!!!! It was like Woodstock with out the brown acid and mud……
I am so skint that I did not make it to Mortal Sin last nite and have been rank about it ever since. Manning was supossed to get these flyers see…. oh Man! Why me ??? Why could I have not been a dumb fuck civilian with a morgage and a penchant for Celine Dion…NOT! I am a pirate girl me! Pass me that parrot and get out the fucking way!
He called before and it looks like some courrier in the Surry hills area is gonna get 7 shades of shit kicked out of him by one very irate guitar player. I knew he would come to the dark side sooner or later…..
Tell ya what hurts but… culling my book collection. I got some dried up old dude comming over to tell me what it is all worth and I am at the point that as long as it gets me the hell out of here its all worth it. Know anyone who wants to buy a 7 and a half foot hand carved leather sofa? You can always buy stuff but ya cant buy time and that is the enemy… well at least one of them. My “Hell are YOU gonna pay!” list is a bit too detailed to put up here.
Funny shit. A whole mess of try hards from the Ranch days are getting their just desserts and I didnt even have to crack a skull or a sweat. Knew that Elvis was up there watcing over my rotten- to- the- core self.
B* said in conversation the other day ,I cant remember what the hell we were on about….” I would not wish that on anyone!” said the B*.”No shit?” said me ” I wish the black Plauge on people! Dosnt everyone?””Nope….” she said exhaling Lucky strike particles towards the living room cealing….I think that is a crock. ! I just think that I am a rare creature being that I admit such things.No scratch that…That I say it out loud…erm…That I write Entire albums about it?.
Hehehheh……..
Good weather to run in. I have been hauling my fat ass around more than ever. Not as much as I should. B* is always on “My Space” hooking us up left right and center and I press weights watching Pantera home videos…yawn…right?. Got word from Miss Sophia Cherry pie in NZ who has broken my balls with the News that she and the ever Talented Mr Craft are staying put…gutted, me. I was counting sleeps to my back peice! What the fuck am I ment to do now? Carve a fucking canoe??? To all out in the land of the long white [ dope ] cloud keep an eye on K road in Auckland. The Illicit crew are about to fuck shit up. I wish ya’ll nothing but luck….. Miss S? Tell Martin to make me into a cartoon and I will not be as miffed..OK?.Cheers.
It is a weird thing that I need not explain to the inked sikfuks out there but once you let some one carve up your dermis you really dont want to let anyone else to do it. Ya feel like ya gotta stay faithful.
Just outta left field…. If you can prove that some one was totally asking for it, just to change the tone for a moment, How long to you get for justifiable manslaughter?.Would ya’ll miss me? Whatever….
I am ugly inside and out. I should never pick up the phone. Miss Karen just got a saturday nite dose of Michele on the TKO rant. I am the asshole paying rent on Soundgarden’s “Rusty cage”…I am also listening to The Stooges which means that I am gonna end up doing myself some damage tonite.That or I will burn out and end up semi catatonic with my hunting knife crouched by the stairs in the dark waiting….
Never forget kids…no-one cares. It is a rare and beautiful creature who will take your call at 3am and mean it. I used to. I used to do it all the goddamn time. That was when I was a sucker. Got burned. Got Used. Got pretty fucking smart..
Cunning is beauty. You can take your air brushed pussy,87 grand cars…Oh man! Fuck all that.I want animal grace. I want truth . I wanna go blind on it. I want to burn out like a self emoliating monk. Pass me that match…. I want some dumb shit to be scraping my ugly assed insides off the walls. I am Broken arrow. I am the airstrike. See Me? I am the end of the line. I am the last resort. I am Cancer.I am the death of a child. I am The fucking car crash. You know that you are gonna look cause you just cant help yourself….
And I dont fucking care.
Know what I like about you sikfuks? You know shit. You get hung for it and you keep going. You dont speak unless you got somthing to say. Me? For real? most of the time I wouldnt say shit if I had a mouthful. Why the hell would I? I can sit here and write my life away. I like your style.
I dig ya fuckin taste in music too…….
Burns the hell out of me ….I gotta sell my CD collection as well. The guys down at Revolution at Newtown are gonna look at me like the drop out that I am….It is a good burn though… cause from here on in, as always, no cunt can take the credit for Me. For the havoc that I am gonna rain down ….I will get over the loss, I always do and the lighter you are? The less you have? Well. The faster you move.
I am almost there….
Nothing left to lose…
Oh man…bring it on.
SF4L
Michele.
